Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Saturday, September 12, 2009
IEP Meeting
So yesterday was the first IEP meeting of the brand new school year and my first meeting with the new school. We're still very much in the wait-and-see phase of this placement although it's definitely an improvement over the last school. And there are definite signs that this one might MIGHT work out. S has been up and down... one day she likes the school, the next day she doesn't want to go there, and she's already tried to play sick one day. But I also think that she's not sure what to think because I haven't wholeheartedly endorsed it. In fact yesterday when I said I was happy overall with the administration she said, "See, Mom, I told you it was a good school!" So that kind of confirms that suspicion.
Anyway, going into the meeting I was a bit concerned after learning that S had already been mainstreamed for two classes as well as for electives. It looked to me like she was in the self-contained room for only one period a day which was of course completely contrary to what was supposed to happen. As it turns out, though, the two mainstream classes are actually on alternating days so it's really only one block a day and those classes only have 13 students in them. And the math class is in the self-contained room just with a different teacher (who S loves and who already has her liking math). Furthermore, S had already told me how much she loves the social studies teacher because on the first day he told them all about how he grew up poor with a single mom and he was determined to make something of his life and they can too... something like that. And the science teacher took part in the IEP meeting and said that S was "a pleasure to have in my class." And it's possible that my ears were still ringing from S's early morning shriek-fest when I told her she couldn't wear slippers to school in the pouring rain even though they did look like boots, but I'm pretty sure that's what the teacher said.
As for the emotional support teacher who is supposed to be guiding S's every move... I have to say, I really like her. She's very young but seems incredibly dedicated to her career choice. She has an obvious fondness for S and really seems determined to help her. The classroom itself has four boys and S which at first seemed kind of tragic but now it looks like they've kind of turned it into a situation where S is actually able to feel special. The teacher said she leaves little secret notes for S, things like thanking her for volunteering to read out loud or for being so patient with one of the lower-functioning boys in the class, and S delights in these notes, and sneaks little notes back, and really it's such a good situation. And S has told me proudly on several occasions how she's the "best" kid in the class and we talk about her setting a good example for the other kids and being a helper to the teacher and that fits right in with her desire to mother and boss and all that stuff.
We also talked in the meeting about the honeymoon period (they brought it up!) and S's history of starting out okay and then spiraling downhill as things don't unfold exactly the way she envisions them. I gave them a letter from her AT outlining how best to teach a kid like S and they were genuinely happy for the pointers. They also asked me a lot of questions about her triggers, what they should watch out for, how best to redirect her... It was so refreshing. Is it possible that a public school gets it?? Then after the meeting the teacher sent me a quick email thanking me for coming in and telling me how much she appreciates having such a committed parent on her team. And even better, she went to class and told S the same thing, and S came home proud and happy and feeling loved. Which is of course the best thing that could happen.
As far as finalization is concerned, we're fortunately not seeing too many of the behaviors I feared. We had a great therapy session this week and sort of forced S to talk about everything she was feeling leading up to the finalization (scared, excited, happy, sad) and why she was having those feelings and how they were normal. Then the AT had me look into S's eyes and tell her that I was going to adopt her and that she would be my daughter forever and I was so happy and proud that I got to be her mother. And God help me, we connected. She believed me, and from that moment on she's been a different kid. I'm not saying it's permanent but just that what could have been a really tumultuous, behavior-filled week has actually been a pleasure. We've been close and affectionate and she's been polite and respectful and helpful and appropriately excited for Wednesday. A few nights ago I was doing laundry and she called down to me from upstairs: "Mom? My mom who is my forever mom and won't ever give up on me?" And we chuckled but it was sweet.
So right now we're moving forward. We have some family and friends coming to the finalization so we're going to stay out of work and school and go to lunch with them and then spend the day doing something fun. We're going to start planning her party too but it won't be for another month or two because currently our state is without a budget and has led to the County cutting off my subsidy until it's resolved. And that's a post for another day. The important thing is that S, who has talked about this adoption party for months, is perfectly fine putting it off and is actually more excited about the actual court date than the party. And that is definitely a good sign.
Anyway, going into the meeting I was a bit concerned after learning that S had already been mainstreamed for two classes as well as for electives. It looked to me like she was in the self-contained room for only one period a day which was of course completely contrary to what was supposed to happen. As it turns out, though, the two mainstream classes are actually on alternating days so it's really only one block a day and those classes only have 13 students in them. And the math class is in the self-contained room just with a different teacher (who S loves and who already has her liking math). Furthermore, S had already told me how much she loves the social studies teacher because on the first day he told them all about how he grew up poor with a single mom and he was determined to make something of his life and they can too... something like that. And the science teacher took part in the IEP meeting and said that S was "a pleasure to have in my class." And it's possible that my ears were still ringing from S's early morning shriek-fest when I told her she couldn't wear slippers to school in the pouring rain even though they did look like boots, but I'm pretty sure that's what the teacher said.
As for the emotional support teacher who is supposed to be guiding S's every move... I have to say, I really like her. She's very young but seems incredibly dedicated to her career choice. She has an obvious fondness for S and really seems determined to help her. The classroom itself has four boys and S which at first seemed kind of tragic but now it looks like they've kind of turned it into a situation where S is actually able to feel special. The teacher said she leaves little secret notes for S, things like thanking her for volunteering to read out loud or for being so patient with one of the lower-functioning boys in the class, and S delights in these notes, and sneaks little notes back, and really it's such a good situation. And S has told me proudly on several occasions how she's the "best" kid in the class and we talk about her setting a good example for the other kids and being a helper to the teacher and that fits right in with her desire to mother and boss and all that stuff.
We also talked in the meeting about the honeymoon period (they brought it up!) and S's history of starting out okay and then spiraling downhill as things don't unfold exactly the way she envisions them. I gave them a letter from her AT outlining how best to teach a kid like S and they were genuinely happy for the pointers. They also asked me a lot of questions about her triggers, what they should watch out for, how best to redirect her... It was so refreshing. Is it possible that a public school gets it?? Then after the meeting the teacher sent me a quick email thanking me for coming in and telling me how much she appreciates having such a committed parent on her team. And even better, she went to class and told S the same thing, and S came home proud and happy and feeling loved. Which is of course the best thing that could happen.
As far as finalization is concerned, we're fortunately not seeing too many of the behaviors I feared. We had a great therapy session this week and sort of forced S to talk about everything she was feeling leading up to the finalization (scared, excited, happy, sad) and why she was having those feelings and how they were normal. Then the AT had me look into S's eyes and tell her that I was going to adopt her and that she would be my daughter forever and I was so happy and proud that I got to be her mother. And God help me, we connected. She believed me, and from that moment on she's been a different kid. I'm not saying it's permanent but just that what could have been a really tumultuous, behavior-filled week has actually been a pleasure. We've been close and affectionate and she's been polite and respectful and helpful and appropriately excited for Wednesday. A few nights ago I was doing laundry and she called down to me from upstairs: "Mom? My mom who is my forever mom and won't ever give up on me?" And we chuckled but it was sweet.
So right now we're moving forward. We have some family and friends coming to the finalization so we're going to stay out of work and school and go to lunch with them and then spend the day doing something fun. We're going to start planning her party too but it won't be for another month or two because currently our state is without a budget and has led to the County cutting off my subsidy until it's resolved. And that's a post for another day. The important thing is that S, who has talked about this adoption party for months, is perfectly fine putting it off and is actually more excited about the actual court date than the party. And that is definitely a good sign.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Finally
We have a finalization date... September 16th. That's two weeks from today, people. When S heard the news she screamed, threw her arms around me and burst into tears. I'll consider that a good reaction.
Question: I feel like I should get her something to commemorate the occasion. I briefly considered jewelry but she's so completely irresponsible (our current battle) that I might as well just throw the money directly into the trash. Maybe flowers or something? I just don't know. Do people generally get their kids gifts for finalization?
School started yesterday. She's in a smaller school in the district but not the private school I was hoping for. Of course I knew this was the likely scenario... the district needs to prove that they've done everything they could before referring her out. And it's really not tragic. In fact for now it seems remotely possible that she'll do okay there. Not likely but slightly possible. At least the teacher is AWESOME and the school is tiny. In other words, I don't think she'll be actively harmed by being there. It's a definite improvement over her last school. And of course I'll be watching very closely.
Will be back to more regular blogging once life settles back into a routine. I'll admit to slacking on the structure over the summer. She's still done great overall. So much progress I sometimes forget that she's anything but a normal, snotty 12-year-old. I'm sure she'll be reminding me soon enough.
Question: I feel like I should get her something to commemorate the occasion. I briefly considered jewelry but she's so completely irresponsible (our current battle) that I might as well just throw the money directly into the trash. Maybe flowers or something? I just don't know. Do people generally get their kids gifts for finalization?
School started yesterday. She's in a smaller school in the district but not the private school I was hoping for. Of course I knew this was the likely scenario... the district needs to prove that they've done everything they could before referring her out. And it's really not tragic. In fact for now it seems remotely possible that she'll do okay there. Not likely but slightly possible. At least the teacher is AWESOME and the school is tiny. In other words, I don't think she'll be actively harmed by being there. It's a definite improvement over her last school. And of course I'll be watching very closely.
Will be back to more regular blogging once life settles back into a routine. I'll admit to slacking on the structure over the summer. She's still done great overall. So much progress I sometimes forget that she's anything but a normal, snotty 12-year-old. I'm sure she'll be reminding me soon enough.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
It's not my fault you don't have any friends
There, I said it. I feel enormously better.
So we're surviving, behavior continues to be as good as a hormonal 12-year-old girl can be although she's had a few screamy moments as school is fast approaching. We're starting the school year at her old school while I continue my discussions with the district about a private placement. I do have a school in mind, I just need the blessing from the district to pay for it. She's stressing about starting back to the school where she had so many problems last year. Me too. We got some new school clothes and she's convinced herself that everyone will see her new clothes, think how cute they are, realize she must have changed and suddenly want to be her friend. I'm trying to casually curb this fantasy but it really breaks my heart to think of her trying to be excited and hopeful when I know it's not going to make a damn bit of difference what she's wearing. I swear, if one kid says anything negative about her first-day-of-school outfit that she's already tried on a hundred times I will go to that school and kick some ass.
In the meantime her social life continues to be a huge issue for her. She has no friends, constantly fantasizes about finding some, and I think the acquisition of some would make both of our lives so much easier. Next week we're spending four days at the beach and she wants to bring along "a friend." When I ask who she'd like to bring she mentions random people she's met one time or little autistic 8-year-olds from camp. Then when I try to explain how I want it to just be the two of us, that it's a lot of responsibility to bring along another child, etc., etc. she gets angry. And I just want to scream, "It's not my fault you don't have friends! Trust me... I would love it if you didn't act like such a nutball around other kids!" But of course I refrain, and smile sweetly and deal with it.
I really think the new school is the key to finding her friends. She can't be friends with "normal" kids right now. She's made so many strides and I'm so proud of her but this is really a problem for us. How do other people handle finding friends for their bossy, manipulative, socially awkward RAD kids??
Anyway, I'll be back to regularly scheduled blogging as soon as summer ends and routine begins again. For now I'm enjoying my summer with my mostly sweet and funny daughter who will probably be morphing back into a loon on or about September 1st. Until then, I'm going to just enjoy her.
So we're surviving, behavior continues to be as good as a hormonal 12-year-old girl can be although she's had a few screamy moments as school is fast approaching. We're starting the school year at her old school while I continue my discussions with the district about a private placement. I do have a school in mind, I just need the blessing from the district to pay for it. She's stressing about starting back to the school where she had so many problems last year. Me too. We got some new school clothes and she's convinced herself that everyone will see her new clothes, think how cute they are, realize she must have changed and suddenly want to be her friend. I'm trying to casually curb this fantasy but it really breaks my heart to think of her trying to be excited and hopeful when I know it's not going to make a damn bit of difference what she's wearing. I swear, if one kid says anything negative about her first-day-of-school outfit that she's already tried on a hundred times I will go to that school and kick some ass.
In the meantime her social life continues to be a huge issue for her. She has no friends, constantly fantasizes about finding some, and I think the acquisition of some would make both of our lives so much easier. Next week we're spending four days at the beach and she wants to bring along "a friend." When I ask who she'd like to bring she mentions random people she's met one time or little autistic 8-year-olds from camp. Then when I try to explain how I want it to just be the two of us, that it's a lot of responsibility to bring along another child, etc., etc. she gets angry. And I just want to scream, "It's not my fault you don't have friends! Trust me... I would love it if you didn't act like such a nutball around other kids!" But of course I refrain, and smile sweetly and deal with it.
I really think the new school is the key to finding her friends. She can't be friends with "normal" kids right now. She's made so many strides and I'm so proud of her but this is really a problem for us. How do other people handle finding friends for their bossy, manipulative, socially awkward RAD kids??
Anyway, I'll be back to regularly scheduled blogging as soon as summer ends and routine begins again. For now I'm enjoying my summer with my mostly sweet and funny daughter who will probably be morphing back into a loon on or about September 1st. Until then, I'm going to just enjoy her.
Friday, July 31, 2009
An interesting week
It started Monday with a road trip to S's hometown for a hearing. While we were there we went past the house she lived in with her birth family and took some pictures for her upcoming lifebook. The neighborhood was just like you'd imagine - lots of old houses in disrepair and grungy, half-dressed kids running around unsupervised. S didn't really remember the house (she hasn't lived there in 6 1/2 years) but I had the address so I know we found the right one. As we looked at it she claimed to start to remember and even described her bedroom for me. Does anyone believe she had a pink room with a canopy bed and hundreds of stuffed animals? Me either.
On the four-hour drive home she decided she'd write a letter to birth mom telling her that she should get her act together so she could "get your daughter back," and inviting birth mom to live with us until she could save enough money to get the two of them a house. Then when we got home she wrote an angry letter to her grandma blasting her for not adopting her. And as finalization draws closer, the mourning for the birth family may have officially begun.
And along with the mourning comes the behaviors, which in this case has been more about escaping reality than busting up all my stuff. Thank goodness for small favors. On Tuesday she came home from camp with the news that she would be leaving that night to go live in Neverland. She said that Peter Pan would be coming for her at 9:09 and she was sure it would happen because a little girl at camp told her that she had been there many times and was only back in this world looking for friends to recruit to go live there with her. And the scariest part of this story is the fact that S told her mobile therapist about her impending move, and then later that night told her psychiatrist about it, and no one really batted an eye. The psychiatrist said extremely helpful things such as, "Neverland? Is that an amusement park? Won't they be closed by then? My kids never mentioned that one. You should go to Disney World, that's fun too!" And even after I looked at her meaningfully and told her that it doesn't EXIST, that it's in her MIND and that she hears Peter Pan TALKING TO HER the psychiatrist still didn't get it. Nice.
Anyway, Peter Pan did not, in fact, arrive at 9:09 and S explained to me that Tinkerbell had gotten sick unexpectedly and was too delirious to drink from the Golden Pond so Peter had to stay behind and care for the Lost Boys. He was going to get her from camp the next day, and in fact she packed a bag for herself and for the new baby girl that Peter was going pick up for her on his way to Neverland. Then before the camp bus came she went around saying goodbye to all the animals and to me, although she did promise to come back for her adoption finalization. She said I should feel free to write to her with the date and the doves would deliver the letter. She'd be living with her new son and daughter in a hollowed out tree with a canopy bed. And in case anyone was wondering, Neverland is located on the second star to the right of the moon.
So of course she was in foul humor when she got home that day and had not, in fact, been transported to Neverland, and after she snotted at me one time too many I became fed up and told her that if she didn't stop talking like a crazy person I was going to take her to the hospital and that I know she's too smart to believe this and was quite frankly tired of hearing about it. She immediately welled up and said, "I just want to believe it so bad." And FINALLY we were able to talk about it. I told her that I'd love to be able to escape to a place like Neverland but the fact is we have to make our own happiness here in this world. And I told her my theory that she's so freaked out over the impending adoption and so scared that it's not going to happen that she's trying to do anything she can to escape to a safe place. But I said I WILL be adopting her and I can't wait to be her mom forever and we're going to have a wonderful life that's even better than Neverland. And that was that. Neverland was forgotten and my newly-sweet, compliant daughter had returned.
Meanwhile I'm totally dumping the behavior specialist who cancels more appointments than she keeps (she forgot our appointment this week) and who last week accused me of being too permissive because S got upset and told me she wants a new family and the BSC said that I needed to punish her for hurting my feelings like that. And also the mobile therapist who keeps suggesting sticker charts and spends half her visits telling me about all the guys she meets online. I am so over these people.
So that was our week. Tomorrow we're doing some school shopping even though we have no idea where she'll be going to school. I'm actually thinking of enrolling her in an online homeschool until the district gets their act together and finds her a private school. I'd need to find suitable in-home childcare who could monitor her school work (not an easy job) but it's something to consider. I hate the idea of her going to another temporary school. I just have to think positively that she'll be able to get into a private placement for the start of the school year. I should have an answer next week.
And that should do it for now. It's summertime and the living is mostly easy. And despite all the craziness, I kind of love my life.
On the four-hour drive home she decided she'd write a letter to birth mom telling her that she should get her act together so she could "get your daughter back," and inviting birth mom to live with us until she could save enough money to get the two of them a house. Then when we got home she wrote an angry letter to her grandma blasting her for not adopting her. And as finalization draws closer, the mourning for the birth family may have officially begun.
And along with the mourning comes the behaviors, which in this case has been more about escaping reality than busting up all my stuff. Thank goodness for small favors. On Tuesday she came home from camp with the news that she would be leaving that night to go live in Neverland. She said that Peter Pan would be coming for her at 9:09 and she was sure it would happen because a little girl at camp told her that she had been there many times and was only back in this world looking for friends to recruit to go live there with her. And the scariest part of this story is the fact that S told her mobile therapist about her impending move, and then later that night told her psychiatrist about it, and no one really batted an eye. The psychiatrist said extremely helpful things such as, "Neverland? Is that an amusement park? Won't they be closed by then? My kids never mentioned that one. You should go to Disney World, that's fun too!" And even after I looked at her meaningfully and told her that it doesn't EXIST, that it's in her MIND and that she hears Peter Pan TALKING TO HER the psychiatrist still didn't get it. Nice.
Anyway, Peter Pan did not, in fact, arrive at 9:09 and S explained to me that Tinkerbell had gotten sick unexpectedly and was too delirious to drink from the Golden Pond so Peter had to stay behind and care for the Lost Boys. He was going to get her from camp the next day, and in fact she packed a bag for herself and for the new baby girl that Peter was going pick up for her on his way to Neverland. Then before the camp bus came she went around saying goodbye to all the animals and to me, although she did promise to come back for her adoption finalization. She said I should feel free to write to her with the date and the doves would deliver the letter. She'd be living with her new son and daughter in a hollowed out tree with a canopy bed. And in case anyone was wondering, Neverland is located on the second star to the right of the moon.
So of course she was in foul humor when she got home that day and had not, in fact, been transported to Neverland, and after she snotted at me one time too many I became fed up and told her that if she didn't stop talking like a crazy person I was going to take her to the hospital and that I know she's too smart to believe this and was quite frankly tired of hearing about it. She immediately welled up and said, "I just want to believe it so bad." And FINALLY we were able to talk about it. I told her that I'd love to be able to escape to a place like Neverland but the fact is we have to make our own happiness here in this world. And I told her my theory that she's so freaked out over the impending adoption and so scared that it's not going to happen that she's trying to do anything she can to escape to a safe place. But I said I WILL be adopting her and I can't wait to be her mom forever and we're going to have a wonderful life that's even better than Neverland. And that was that. Neverland was forgotten and my newly-sweet, compliant daughter had returned.
Meanwhile I'm totally dumping the behavior specialist who cancels more appointments than she keeps (she forgot our appointment this week) and who last week accused me of being too permissive because S got upset and told me she wants a new family and the BSC said that I needed to punish her for hurting my feelings like that. And also the mobile therapist who keeps suggesting sticker charts and spends half her visits telling me about all the guys she meets online. I am so over these people.
So that was our week. Tomorrow we're doing some school shopping even though we have no idea where she'll be going to school. I'm actually thinking of enrolling her in an online homeschool until the district gets their act together and finds her a private school. I'd need to find suitable in-home childcare who could monitor her school work (not an easy job) but it's something to consider. I hate the idea of her going to another temporary school. I just have to think positively that she'll be able to get into a private placement for the start of the school year. I should have an answer next week.
And that should do it for now. It's summertime and the living is mostly easy. And despite all the craziness, I kind of love my life.
Friday, July 24, 2009
Private Placement... Maybe
So I had my big meeting with the school today and I don't think it could have gone much better. The tough-as-nails director of special ed welled up when I told her that I will NOT give up on this child. I then presented two full binders of papers supporting my position. I had IEPs, letters from therapists and psychiatrists, psych evals, my "school incident log" that I kept all year, even a camp incident log detailing the problems she had at the Y camp at the beginning of the summer. (Have I blogged about how she got kicked out of splash camp the first week?)
Anyway, the director's recommendation to the superintendent will be to place S in an approved private school as of this fall. Of course if the superintendent asks too many questions chances are we'll have to first move her into a more restrictive classroom within the district just to prove she won't be successful there. I'm not really thinking about that possibility right now even though it's the most likely scenario. At least I know now that the school (principal and vice principal) and special ed director are on our side. That's huge. So for now, I'm happy.
We had another pretty good week around here including a major breakthrough in therapy a few nights ago. Of course the next day S apparently decided she'd gotten a little too close for comfort and asked me if I'd let her find a new family. I said I would except I'd miss her too much and that was pretty much that, although the behavior specialist then decided that I should "punish" her for hurting my feelings like that, and then went on to suggest that I'm too permissive. Whatever. I've long since accepted that her behavior specialist isn't going to do a thing for us.
We're headed back to S's hometown for a hearing on Monday and decided tonight that we'd go past her old house and take some pictures. She's been resistant to making a lifebook but she doesn't have one and the AT and I really think it's important. I mentioned the subject tonight and for the first time she agreed that it would be fun to do it. The AT and I decided that our first step will be a scrapbook of her life with me so far. We won't get back to the birth home for quite some time.
And last but not least, I spoke with my attorney yesterday and we're just about ready to file everything. Then we just wait for a finalization date. He estimates 60 days from when all the paperwork is filed so that could be early fall. S can't wait and is currently trying to talk me into inviting some Disney Channel star to her adoption party. Yeah... that'll happen.
Anyway, the director's recommendation to the superintendent will be to place S in an approved private school as of this fall. Of course if the superintendent asks too many questions chances are we'll have to first move her into a more restrictive classroom within the district just to prove she won't be successful there. I'm not really thinking about that possibility right now even though it's the most likely scenario. At least I know now that the school (principal and vice principal) and special ed director are on our side. That's huge. So for now, I'm happy.
We had another pretty good week around here including a major breakthrough in therapy a few nights ago. Of course the next day S apparently decided she'd gotten a little too close for comfort and asked me if I'd let her find a new family. I said I would except I'd miss her too much and that was pretty much that, although the behavior specialist then decided that I should "punish" her for hurting my feelings like that, and then went on to suggest that I'm too permissive. Whatever. I've long since accepted that her behavior specialist isn't going to do a thing for us.
We're headed back to S's hometown for a hearing on Monday and decided tonight that we'd go past her old house and take some pictures. She's been resistant to making a lifebook but she doesn't have one and the AT and I really think it's important. I mentioned the subject tonight and for the first time she agreed that it would be fun to do it. The AT and I decided that our first step will be a scrapbook of her life with me so far. We won't get back to the birth home for quite some time.
And last but not least, I spoke with my attorney yesterday and we're just about ready to file everything. Then we just wait for a finalization date. He estimates 60 days from when all the paperwork is filed so that could be early fall. S can't wait and is currently trying to talk me into inviting some Disney Channel star to her adoption party. Yeah... that'll happen.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Jinxing myself
I'm just going to say it: S is doing great. I'm so proud of her. Her attitude has been great, she does pretty much everything I ask her to do... This morning she was grumpy and I mentioned that I didn't appreciate her attitude and she apologized. She apologized. Sincerely. She meant it. And then she changed it up. Seriously... so proud of her.
I can't help but wonder if she's doing better because it's summer and she doesn't have the added pressure of school. My meeting with the district got pushed back to the 24th (more time to prepare so no big deal) but I really think the school situation is the final piece of her puzzle. She needs a new school. She went to 11 different elementary schools. In the world of social services I suppose that's not so bad but it still shouldn't happen. And bless her, she still wants so badly to be "normal," to look forward to school and friends and fun. And yet the school she was in was nothing but fights and teasing and bullying. Tonight she told me she can't wait for summer to end so she can go back to school, and when I asked her what school she wanted to go to she looked so sad and desperate and just said she didn't know.
Poor kid. She just wants to love school and have friends and love her life. What any 12-year-old girl wants. How awful it must be to have everything in your life be temporary, or undecided, or at the mercy of strangers. I can't let that happen anymore. I will do whatever I can to give her what she needs. I have such high hopes for this kid, and I think she's starting to trust me just the tiniest bit. I simply can't let her down.
I can't help but wonder if she's doing better because it's summer and she doesn't have the added pressure of school. My meeting with the district got pushed back to the 24th (more time to prepare so no big deal) but I really think the school situation is the final piece of her puzzle. She needs a new school. She went to 11 different elementary schools. In the world of social services I suppose that's not so bad but it still shouldn't happen. And bless her, she still wants so badly to be "normal," to look forward to school and friends and fun. And yet the school she was in was nothing but fights and teasing and bullying. Tonight she told me she can't wait for summer to end so she can go back to school, and when I asked her what school she wanted to go to she looked so sad and desperate and just said she didn't know.
Poor kid. She just wants to love school and have friends and love her life. What any 12-year-old girl wants. How awful it must be to have everything in your life be temporary, or undecided, or at the mercy of strangers. I can't let that happen anymore. I will do whatever I can to give her what she needs. I have such high hopes for this kid, and I think she's starting to trust me just the tiniest bit. I simply can't let her down.
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